Elle M'A Donné de Faux Miracles
by Lady-Prince Pyro
Summary: It is not an easy path that Juri and Shiori walk. Their friendship became as thorny as any withered rose bush. Despite the deceptively easy task of reconciling with each other, is treacherous with hardships and confrontations. Set during Black Rose arc
1. Default Chapter

_I do not own Revolutionary Girl Utena, or any of the characters that are involved in it. Shoujo Kakumei Utena - la fillette revolutionnaire -" is a copyrighted work. (C) Be-PaPas, Chiho Saito / Shogakukan, Shokaku Iinkai, TV Tokyo. All references and poetry that I did not create belong to their respective owners. All original characters, poetry, and song lyrics that belong to me should not be used without express permission and notification. Thank you._

**Prologue: Dark Contemplation**

The hot, nearly scalding spray of water pounded on her back, causing her to shiver slightly at the touch of the thin individual strands of warmth. Yet she felt no warmer inside. Inside she was as frozen and barren as a winter wasteland, her heart a gnarled tree whose bare twisted branches reached upwards for the sky. Reaching in a windswept ragged plea for a miracle. A miracle that didn't exist.

Thick strands of sopping wet tangerine hair snaked along her bare shoulders and screened the sides of her face, as if trying to hide the pain and angst showing there. Her form was hunched slightly, leaning her weight against the shower tiled wall in front of her with the palms of her hands. Her right hand curled into a fist, slamming into the tile next to her face, cracking it in a hair-thin line. She stood up resolutely and tilted her chin in cold arrogance, picking up a bath sponge and continuing to scrub her body and skin free from impurities. A hazy mist leaked over the top of the stall door, cloaking the bathroom and fogging up the mirror.

She turned the water off, ringing her hair out, and stepped out onto the soft linen bath rug placed there. Grabbing a towel, she wound it around her lithe figure, and used another to dry her hair. Leaning determinedly on either side of the sink, she used a hand to wipe a smear of visibility across the glass of the mirror. Juri Arisugawa gazed at her own eyes staring back at her. Her face was perfect, like porcelain, betraying no emotion or hint of her thoughts. It was cool and calm, just like she was taught to do while at a photo shoot. But inside…inside her mind was a seething mass of hatred, anger, and desolation.

_Damn you Shiori…damn you for coming back…_She turned on her heel, and stalked out into her bedroom, changing into her silk night gown, and turning out the light. Tomorrow would prove to be most trying. Especially after nightmares of a grinning angelic face, and shrieking swords being ripped from her soul.

To Be Continued


	2. We Wear the Mask

_I do not own Revolutionary Girl Utena, or any of the characters that are involved in it. Shoujo Kakumei Utena - la fillette revolutionnaire -" is a copyrighted work. (C) Be-PaPas, Chiho Saito / Shogakukan, Shokaku Iinkai, TV Tokyo. All references and poetry that I did not create belong to their respective owners. All original characters, poetry, and song lyrics that belong to me should not be used without express permission and notification. Thank you._

We wear the mask that grins and lies,  
It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes,--  
This debt we pay to human guile;  
With torn and bleeding hearts we smile,  
And mouth with myriad subtleties.

Why should the world be otherwise,  
In counting all our tears and sighs?  
Nay, let them only see us, while  
We wear the mask.

_Paul Laurence Dunbar, "We Wear the Mask"_

**Chapter One- We Wear the Mask**

It was morning, and sunlight was beginning to filter through the window, making a small square of light fall on the vague form of a person burrowed deep under the warmth of bed covers. An annoyingly loud alarm clock was beeping electronically on the bedside table, and a pale hand snaked its way out from under the covers, and fumbled about on the desk. After slapping nothing but wood for a minute, it finally managed to land on the button that shut of that horrendous noise. There was a pause of silence, and then it was broken as Juri groaned, and rolled over onto her side.

She sighed, and then seeing as there was no use in delaying the inevitable, she pushed away the sheets covering her face and blinked in the dim sunlight. Sitting up, she swung her legs over the side of the bed and stepped gingerly onto the floor. Standing up, and stretching her athletic body, listening to the sound of bones and joints popping into place after a night of tossing and turning. She looked at the clock, and then headed for her walk-in closet to pull out a fresh uniform for the day. Slipping on a bra, and then stepping into the white folds of cloth, she stood in front of the mirror connected to her vanity table and checked her appearance.

There were slight bags under her eyes, and her hair was a froth of tangled tangerine curls. All in all, she looked absolutely horrid, and Juri would be damned before allowing herself to step out into public looking as she did. She picked up her hairbrush from the vanity top, and made her hair more presentable, and then with a quick touch of make-up, she was ready to go. Picking up her school bag and key, she stepped outside, locked her door, and headed for the cafeteria.

Gazing at the early students, already getting their breakfast and chatting noisily, she spotted Miki sitting at the student council's usual table. She smiled slightly at the sight of him already with a text book open, reading through it with a look of pure concentration. As she made her way over to him, she watched him brush a stray strand of blue hair from his eyes, and his lips move slightly at a particularly interesting formula. Chuckling, she sat down across from him and tapped a manicured nail on the top of his book, getting his attention.

"Why hello Miki, already getting an early start I see?" She gave the barest of smiles as his face lit up when he saw who it was. "Ah, Juri-senpai! Good Morning!" His innocent robin's egg blue eyes twinkled merrily as he turned the book slightly so she could see. The book's spine declared the words 'Trigonometry', something several grades beyond what his class mates were learning.

"I was looking through my math book, and I was really impressed with this formula! Why who knew that you could…" And so he went on for a minute, speaking of the difficult calculations and numeric expressions that had snagged his interest. Juri listened vaguely, nodding now and then, but not really listening. Miki soon finished his explanation and turned to look at her. He frowned slightly in amusement at seeing his fellow duelist looking somewhat out of sorts, practically unheard of for Juri Arisugawa.

"Really now Juri-senpai, you need to go get breakfast. You don't seem to be looking well this morning." As he spoke, his eyes narrowed suspiciously and the frown wasn't amused anymore. If anything, he seemed to be looking stern. Juri smiled slightly again in amusement replying, "Now Miki, don't frown so. It'll give you wrinkles. I didn't sleep well last night. But if you insist, I will go order some toast and fruit."

"And orange juice! You need your vitamin C if you aren't feeling well." He called out, clicking his stopwatch. That frown was back again, and this time her smile did widen, "I think playing the piano suits you better than playing Mother Hen." Miki looked disgruntled at the comment, but it didn't last long. By the time she was back with her purchases, he was already smiling. As she nibbled at the toast and bowl of assorted fruit, he pulled out his clipboard and began writing out information on the fencing sign-up sheets.

Today the fencing team was being tested on a number of drills they had been working on, with Juri (and the help of her partner Miki) judging their speed and fluidity. Lately the team had been growing somewhat lax, and she intended to get them back to the grindstone. When he was done making notations, he handed her the clipboard for her approval. Scanning the lists of names, and the people they were partnered with, she gave a nod of agreement and tucked it into her bag. Miki checked his watch before standing up and taking up his bag.

"The bell is about to ring, so I'm going to head on to class. I'll see you at fencing practice later, senpai!" He gave a wave and headed toward his building. Juri finished the last of her breakfast and deposited the garbage in a nearby trashcan. Picking up her school bag, she began making her way leisurely to class. As she walked, various girls called out to her, and several of her fencing members as well. Giving a cool nod of greeting, she continued on, but nearly stopped when she saw a group of girls heading past her.

They were chatting loudly, giggling about some gossip or another, but what had struck her was one girl walking with them. Shiori Takatsuki was currently relating a past experience with a boyfriend as she was coming up on Juri. Juri forced herself to continue walking, as if she were completely unconcerned, and they nodded to each other as they passed. Shiori went right on with telling her story, not even pausing as she continued the other way, and Juri didn't even so much as slow down. However, if anyone had been watching, they would have noticed a slight clench of Juri's fist as she headed inside her building.

Already Arisugawa knew, the day was not going to get any better.

To Be Continued


	3. A Vow

_I do not own Revolutionary Girl Utena, or any of the characters that are involved in it. Shoujo Kakumei Utena - la fillette revolutionnaire -" is a copyrighted work. (C) Be-PaPas, Chiho Saito / Shogakukan, Shokaku Iinkai, TV Tokyo. All references and poetry that I did not create belong to their respective owners. All original characters, poetry, and song lyrics that belong to me should not be used without express permission and notification. Thank you._

For all things that turn to barrenness

In the dim glass the demons hold,

The glass of outer weariness

Made when God slept in times of old.

There, through the broken branches, go

The ravens of unresting thought;

Flying, crying to and fro

Cruel claw and hungry throat

_W.B. Yeats, "The Two Trees"_

**Chapter Two: A Vow**

Juri Arisugawa sat idly in class, staring out of the window. On the desk top in front of her rested her mechanical pencil and a page of neatly written notes. Her pencil box rested at the upper left corner of the wood space. Everything organized and in its place, her bag resting at her feet. The classroom was in a lull of study, pages turned, papers rustled. All was quiet and calm. Except in her own mind.

Her mind was a whirl of chaotic thoughts and brooding. She couldn't think past what had happened the day before. And try as she might, she just couldn't make sense of it. What had really happened? Had a sword really come bursting from her chest? Was she becoming like the Rose Bride?

A cleared throat caught her attention, and her eyes narrowed dangerously. The teacher loosened his tie nervously and asked if she would read the passage in the book. Not even in the mood to humor him, she closed her book, stood, picked up her bag and walked out of class. The students stared in shock and admiration as she coolly turned over her shoulder, "Council Business."

She left the building and head for the building that housed the elevator that was used for the student council's meetings. As she did so, she stopped and looked up at the school bells that rested silently since Tenjou's last duel. Things were becoming out of hand. First Touga dropped into introverted solitude since his defeat by the victor, then his sister took over…God how that girl annoyed her. And then the odd duel involving the Chairman's fiancée. Just what was going on? And according to Tenjou who had found her coming painfully out of the fencing hall, looking worse for the wear since her collapse, she fought Shiori of all people! Since when had Shiori taken up fencing? The Rose Bride and Utena had had to carry the unconscious girl back down those damn stairs and had taken her to her room, where she woke up remembering nothing of the incident. And according to Juri's sources, such was the case with Ms. Ohtori.

These incidents, and her own rather embarrassing accounts, needed to be brought up and addressed by the council. So far, two unsanctioned duels had taken place, and yet there was not so much as a letter from End of the World. It was maddening, and Juri Arisugawa didn't like it.

She would call a council meeting, even if the younger Kiryuu was running it, because this couldn't be allowed.

An hour and half later, two more silhouettes joined hers around the table of the balcony. Nanami was sitting in her chair looking positively annoyed. Miki was curious as he sat across from her, stopwatch in hand and three glasses of fruit juice before him. Juri reclined against a column silently.

"So what was so important that you had to drag us out of class? Not that I mind that very much, but having to come all the way out here is bothersome." Nanami sniffed indignantly. The blue haired councilman chimed in, "I must admit I'm rather curious myself. What is the reason for this meeting, Juri-senpai?"

Juri hesitated, gathering herself, and keeping her face perfectly blank and neutral as she gave the report of her findings concerning the recent duels. Her voice however faltered as she gave an edited recount of her meeting with Shiori and the taking of the sword. When she had finished, there was silence. Miki clicked his stopwatch, recorded something down, and looked up at her in concern. But before he could speak, Nanami cut him off, "That's absolutely ridiculous! Are you sure you didn't dream all that up?" Nanami gave a huff. Juri's eyes narrowed dangerously. "No…I did not dream it up." The arrogance of that blond haired twit was staggering. And in the current black mood the panther was feeling at the moment, the orange curled fencer had half a mind to deck her right there. But something stopped her, and she looked over to where a silent boy sat.

Miki looked pale, and his eyes were downcast, even as he spoke softly. "I…I believe you Juri." He looked shaken, and Juri couldn't figure out why. Surely her account hadn't caused this…it looked….personal? Miki squeezed his eyes shut tightly, as if holding back the tears. Juri uncrossed her arms and took a seat beside him. "Miki…what is…?"

He took a deep breath, "I experienced the same event…the pain…the sword coming out of my chest…and then I collapsed at the piano…" Juri's normal expression of calm cracked as her eyes widened, "What did you just say? Why did you not inform us earlier?" Even Nanami looked surprised. This was quite unexpected.

"I couldn't…I thought that maybe I had dreamed it all…that it was a figment of my imagination. But if it happened to you, then maybe it was real after all." He looked sullen. Juri, her mind back to the situation at hand, and her composure regained, asked firmly, "And who was it that removed your…sword…?"

The pianist sighed, "My sister…Kozue."

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Juri remained behind to ponder the meeting as the other two left by way of the elevator. They hadn't really been able to decide what course of action to be taken. So far, only Juri and Miki had experienced any sort of attack…but the chairman's fiancée wasn't involved with anyone from the student council, as far as she knew. Without more evidence, it couldn't be decided on what these pattern of attacks centered on.

Her earlier train of thought circled back to her. Was it based on…weakness? Was it inner weakness that made her a target? Miki was always at odds with his sister, although he never spoke of it. It was plain to see, and it rubbed Juri the wrong way every time she saw the impudent girl give that cocky arrogant smirk in his direction. But they were still brother and sister, and that was a tight bond. But what of Shiori then? On that notion, she of course had a deep simmering weakness for the younger girl, had always had it since they were young. And although they were not related, she _had_ grown up with Shiori since they were children. Could that be a link? But then Kanae Ohtori threw that formula away. She simply knew nothing of the chairman and his soon to be bride.

But if it was a weakness, something Juri couldn't stand to tolerate, then…would she be attacked again? Would she start becoming weaker…her sword pulled out by anyone who wanted it? Would she become an expressionless doll like Anthy Himemiya? The notion was unbearable, and she placed a hand over her heart, wincing at the memory of that steel blade bursting out. It had hurt so much…had hurt so deeply. It was like being raped…and that Juri Arisugawa, captain of the fencing team and Student Council Treasurer, could be brought so low…it killed something inside of her. She wasn't so arrogant to think so was invincible, untouchable. But she had worked tirelessly through the years to gain strength and to gain status, so that she might be able to at least have _some_ sense of invulnerability…something to fall back on. She hadn't expected the blow to come from one who looked so fragile, and who held her heart in her hand.

Her eyes closed against the fading noonday sun in memory. She could still feel that delicate manicured hand on her chest, the warm breath from her lips, even as they twisted the knife in her soul a little deeper. Her lower back still ached dully from that odd angle she had been snapped back into.

It was unbearable. Juri's eyes shot open, and she stalked out of the room determinedly. She would not be brought to her knees again…she would not tolerate such weakness again. Shiori Takatsuki may have forgotten what had occurred, or perhaps simply lied that she had, but this councilman would not. As she rode the elevator down, feeling that odd loss of gravity as it descended, her very eyes smoldered with her inner anger.

The panther would not be caught unawares again.

To Be Continued


	4. On the Prowl

_I do not own Revolutionary Girl Utena, or any of the characters that are involved in it. Shoujo Kakumei Utena - la fillette revolutionnaire -" is a copyrighted work. (C) Be-PaPas, Chiho Saito / Shogakukan, Shokaku Iinkai, TV Tokyo. All references and poetry that I did not create belong to their respective owners. All original characters, poetry, and song lyrics that belong to me should not be used without express permission and notification. Thank you._

O what can ail thee, knight-at-arms,

Alone and palely loitering?

The sedge has withered from the lake,

And no birds sing.

O what can ail thee, knight-at-arms,

So haggard and woe-begone?

The squirrel's granary is full,

And the harvest done.

I see a lilly on thy brow

With anguish moist and fever dew,

And on thy cheek a fading rose

Fast withereth too.

_John Keats, "La Belle Dame Sans Merci"_

**Chapter Three: On the Prowl**

In the days that followed, Juri Arisugawa became a harsher person to deal with, especially for those who were members of the fencing club. Her gazes were even more icy than normal, and she had no tolerance for imperfection. Every practice, she would viciously lunge in for the touché, ending the match faster than Tenjou usually rebuffed Touga's advances. But it was after she sent a girl away in tears for not having checked her stance properly that Miki politely asked if she would go for a break. Giving a curt nod, and leaving him to continue the rest of the practice one afternoon, Juri wandered back toward her office, opening up the collar to her jacket as she did so.

The afternoon sun was coming in through the high windows of the fencing hall, lighting everything with a soft orange glow. Shaking her tangerine curls, and sitting down behind her desk, she picked up a clean white hand towel and mopped her face.

The main reason for her irritability lately was that neither she nor Miki had been able to glean anything about where these oddball duelists had gotten their rings…and how they were able to pull swords out of the chests of council members. As it was, they were keeping a close eye out for each other, although neither would tell the other that. And it would also seem that Shiori and Kozue had no recollection of the previous events. Things had returned to normal…at least outwardly.

Inwardly, Juri was a mess.

She had been having trouble sleeping at night, and was spending more and more time at the fountain lost in thought. She hadn't told Miki (and certainly not that arrogant cow Nanami) but there was more to her attack than just 'a childhood friend' pulling a sword from her breast. There was also the event with the locket.

Earlier, before Shiori's visit, Juri had thrown her locket far into the lake. As she sat back in her desk chair, she could still see that shining rose-shaped trinket sailing out into the middle of the lake, splashing and quickly sinking from view.

_So how had it ended up in Shiori's hand?_ And for that matter, Juri couldn't fathom how she had known she had thrown it away. She hadn't seen Shiori at all that day, and she had kept her collar up. It should have been impossible that the maroon haired girl could have ended up with it. _And looked inside…_That was really what was at the heart of her pain. That Shiori had looked inside and had seen it's contents…seen her own picture staring back at her, something the older fencer had been trying to conceal for so long. And had smiled up at her so coldly, with such twisted triumph…

_And now she doesn't even 'remember'…but how could she possibly forget?_

Juri had always lived in fear of the girl's rejection…had always been too timid to truly confess what she felt. And she had also been concerned how others would view the girl, if it got out. Would Shiori be picked on? Shamed? Juri felt shameful every day she bore her secret in silence, but at least her inner disgrace wouldn't spread to the other girl. She would spare her that at the very least. It was really all she could do.

She must have fallen asleep for a short time, sitting back in her leather cushioned seat, because when her eyelids fluttered open to the sound of a slight cough, Juri found a girl standing in her office. And of course, with the luck she had been having lately, it of course was the one girl she had been trying to avoid.

"Hello Juri-senpai…"

Juri groaned mentally, but even so, her heart skipped a beat. Why was it that just the presence of this girl could make her throat constrict and her chest tighten? Why couldn't she just be normal?

Juri immediately sat up straight at her desk, and folded her hands over a stack of documents she had reviewed the previous day.

"Good afternoon Shiori. Might I help you with something?"

That's right Juri, just keep acting normal…don't let anything slip. Show you have at least a little dignity, even after you've been caught sleeping on the job.

Shiori wrung her hands over her pleated skirt, and nervously brushed back a stray lock of hair. It looked as though she had hurried to get here. What could be the matter?

"Ah, yes…I noticed on the bulletin board that the fencing team is accepting new members again. I was…hoping to maybe try out…"

Juri's eyes widened before she could stop herself, and already she was mentally swearing up a storm.

No way! Absolutely not! She didn't even like fencing when she was last here at Ohtori! Having her around will only create problems. She probably has had no formal training, a total liability. Besides, Shiori is one of the people we are supposed to be investigating! This can't happen…I won't let it. Not going to happen…

"Well, Shiori…it would, ah…really depend upon your prior fencing experience. Such as if you've taken any lessons before this point."

There…now she has a polite and acceptable way of backing out.

"I've been taking it for a couple years now, at my old school."

Damn…but that still doesn't mean she'll make the team. Try-outs will determine whether or not she'll make the cut, and from what Miki has told me, there are quite a few interesting prospects.

"I see…well then, here is a flyer with all of the information you will need. The Try-outs are tomorrow after classes. If you are interested, I will see you then." Unable to help herself despite her mental arguments with her better judgment, she couldn't help but remark quietly, "…I thought you didn't like fencing."

Shiori for the first time looked Juri straight in the eye, with a wry and just a slightly bitter smile. "A lot of things have changed since then."

Yes they have…more than you know.

Shiori eventually left, and Juri remained seated behind her desk, feeling tired. Miki came in, saying that the fencers had been dismissed, and had left for their dorms. He looked concernedly at Juri, but she shook her head and gave a soft, small, smile. He gave a smile in return, feeling reassured, and left as well, bidding her a pleasant evening.

Juri listened to the doors outside her office close behind him, and switched on the desk lamp, deciding to finish what paperwork remained to be taken care of before the Try-Outs the next day. As she worked, her fingertips played idly with the thin gold chain around her neck. When she had finished, and it had indeed grown later, the council member stood, switched off the light, and locked up behind her.

She stopped at the cafeteria, still open for those students who ate all of their meals on Ohtori grounds, and purchased a sandwich and a sealed juice can. She wasn't feeling very hungry…in fact she never really was hungry. Some days it seemed she just went on pure determination alone.

Unwrapping her sandwich as she walked away, but not stopping at any of the tables that were nearly empty, she kept on walking through the rows. The sky had faded into a pale purple-bluish hue that signified it was on the cusp of night, but still not quite ready to relinquish it's golden sun. Leisurely walking across the grounds, and not really caring at that point what people thought of her prowling about while eating, she made her way on the outskirts of the covered halls and past the gleaming classroom buildings.

She made her way to the fountain that had gradually become one of the few safe havens she enjoyed resting. But she halted as she noticed a pair of students partially hidden by the spray of water. A male and a female…making out no doubt. Such vulgar public displays turned her off, so she turned away, not even bothering to rebuke them. She just wasn't in the mood.

She walked to the edge of the woods that hid the dueling arena's gate from view. But she didn't go in. The ominous set of stairs, and the shining upside-down castle didn't exactly offer solace or comfort. They made one feel…insignificant…burdened…

So she kept walking, tossing her sandwich wrapping into a trash bin as she walked on. On a whim, she made her way by the music room. From within, she could hear the faint tinklings of the piano. An all too familiar song, one whose ghostly quality floated across this portion of the campus. Miki was haunted too, just as she was. Only his past didn't lie locked within a golden cage around his neck. Instead, it remained inside a song he could never finish.

Pausing to listen to a few bars, the song gradually changed into a different, more lighter classical piece. But it was still unfamiliar to the orange curled woman. No doubt it was another he had composed himself. That brought a proud smile to the silent duelist's lips. She had always felt somewhat protective of the blue haired prodigy. His innocence was…rare…and his friendship was one of the few she truly treasured.

But the panther still felt the need to continue moving and exploring. So she made her way inside the building, but instead of heading down the hall to the music room, she went up the flights of stairs, and opened the door to the roof. Night had finally fallen over the quiet campus, most students already away in their dorm rooms, as curfew was nearly up. Being able to stay out, as she liked, was one of the few perks Juri enjoyed from her council position. The sky was opened up to her like a magnificent canopy of twinkling stars and a glowing crescent moon that hung from the velvet darkness. She rarely stayed out to enjoy such simple pleasures, and she enjoyed the cool air on her face.

Taking a seat on the large overhanging ledge, and popping open the top of her canned juice, Juri quietly marveled at the scene arrayed in front of her. It helped her to clear her mind, and brush away the nagging doubts and questions that had cluttered it lately. She went to take a sip once more from her can, her jacket completely unbuttoned and flapping in the breeze, revealing an aquamarine cut off tank top underneath. That was when the scent of cloves reached her nose. Turning her head, she saw a female figure resting against the side of the building, next to the door that led to the stairs. The clouds drifted away from the moon, and for a moment Juri thought it was Miki standing there.

But of course, with that sly smirk, it could only be his sister.

Kozue gazed back at her without so much as a nod of acknowledgment. Juri felt that headache coming back. Juri turned away, where normally she would have walked over and sent the girl packing for her dorm. She was after curfew after all. But once again, she felt no desire to involve herself. This once, she felt like being only an observer, not an uppity hall monitor.

She set her can down on the ledge next to her, and wrapped her arms around her knees. The curly haired woman stayed that way for a while, until Kozue seated herself next to the fencer, offering her a cigarette. Juri's eyes narrowed, but she shook her head. The cigarette was shook back into its pack with a flick of a slender wrist. Miki's twin was the first to speak.

"Don't often see you around here, Arisugawa…what brings you this way so late at night? I saw you prowling about outside the window. I became….curious."

Juri didn't rise to the bait. She said nothing for a moment, but then replied, "I felt like a walk is all."

Kozue grinned. "That so? You see pretty thoughtful sitting there. Something bugging you?"

"And you seem pretty talkative tonight. Something 'bugging' you?"

Kozue smirked, and gave a nod of acknowledgment at the return. They stayed sitting that way for a little while, with Kozue swinging her legs off the side of the building, and Juri sitting there composed. Glancing at her from the corner of her eye, Kozue intoned, "Hmmm…sure you don't want that cigarette?"

And Juri suddenly did. She was tired…so damn tired of the daily hassles and headaches. Tired of the duels. She stretched out a hand without looking over, and a slender cylinder was placed within her fingertips. She popped the cig between her lips and took the lighter from the younger girl, lighting the end with a practiced ease. Handing the plastic torch back, and inhaling deeply, Juri removed the cigarette with her right hand, balancing her body with her left. She exhaled a pale stream into the night, and felt her tension leave her in that breath.

The two women continued sitting, listening to the faint piano music drifting up from below.

"Yeah…much better."

To Be Continued


	5. Painful Decisions

_I do not own Revolutionary Girl Utena, or any of the characters that are involved in it. Shoujo Kakumei Utena - la fillette revolutionnaire -" is a copyrighted work. (C) Be-PaPas, Chiho Saito / Shogakukan, Shokaku Iinkai, TV Tokyo. All references and poetry that I did not create belong to their respective owners. All original characters, poetry, and song lyrics that belong to me should not be used without express permission and notification. Thank you._

"…They'd judge us--how?  
For you served Heaven, you know  
Or sought to;  
I could not,

Because you saturated sight,  
And I had no more eyes  
For sordid excellence  
As Paradise.

And were you lost, I would be,  
Though my name  
Rang loudest  
On the heavenly fame.

And were you saved,  
And I condemned to be  
Where you were not,  
That self were hell to me.

So we must keep apart,  
You there, I here,  
With just the door ajar  
That oceans are,  
And prayer,  
And that pale sustenance,  
Despair!"

_From Emily Dickenson's I Cannot Live With You_

**Chapter Four: Painful Decisions**

She'd practiced her look in front of the mirror all morning after her shower, so that she was certain she'd give nothing of her inner turmoil away. Her smooth, polite, façade was safely intact, as Juri Arisugawa began to pace along the lines of waiting fencers. Today was the day they were to hold try-outs for new potentials. A way to get new blood into the team, and also have a sort of scale to measure how well their veterans were improving. A mentoring system generally occurred, the new students pairing up with those who had been practicing longer. The group as a whole improved their sword skills, and developed strong bonds of camaraderie. It was a good system, and one that had worked towards Ohtori's advantage in the tournament bouts they had entered over the years.

So why did she feel like calling the whole entire thing off? Scratch that question. She knew the answer. And it's name was 'Shiori'. _And speak of the devil…_ The younger girl's maroon hair was unmistakably in the small crowd. The fencing captain fought the urge to sigh deeply.

"Juri-senpai, everyone on the try-outs list as arrived. Shall I take them through some basic drills?" Miki smiled warmly from behind his clipboard. Juri gave him a small smile, grateful for his presence and answered aloud. "Yes. Let's begin."

Blowing her whistle, she had the rows of fencers lined up correctly and began taking them through a series of drills. Having Miki and the veterans demonstrate each new move before the potentials tried it out for themselves. Again and again, her sharp whistle cut through the air, picking up a timing as she wandered in an out of the rows. Fixing an arm here, adjusting a hip there, her piercing aquamarine eyes constantly roaming. Coming up behind one young man who was overextended, she reached around his body to try and realign him, only to have him nearly leap from his skin. Blushing furiously, he apologized, but try as he might, he couldn't seem to concentrate on what the fencing captain was trying to show him. He seemed far more interested in feeling her hands on his body. Annoyed at this lack of discipline, the orange curled fencer decided it was time to up the test level.

"Alright. All of you line up; you shall have a practice bout against Miki and myself. From there we'll determine your level of skill based on a series of criteria." More than a few students seemed to blanch, while their more experienced counterparts looked on eagerly. Not bothering to look over her shoulder, Juri motioned for Miki to come with her towards the practice area and don his mask. Giving him a small smirk, her mood lightening up a touch, she murmured. "Let's…shake them up a bit. Test their mettle."

Miki cocked his head to the side cutely, and then gave a warm smile of understanding and acceptance. "Of course! I shall do my best." He took a position parallel to her, and they both raised their swords in salute. Pulling on their masks with a practiced ease, Juri's voice rang out clearly across the polished wooden floor.

"First in line, up!"

The practice continued, Juri going against each fencer in her line for a one-on-one bout. To the students, it was like watching a goddess on the battlefield. She never seemed to tire; her movements were always fluid and exact. Miki seemed her perfect compliment, crisp and technical in all he did. Between the two of them, the large gathering was quickly cycled. Students with helmets torn off and sweat beading their faces collapsed tiredly on the sidelines, as they watched each of their teammates fall to the duo's merciless swordsmanship. Eventually only a few stragglers remained, and Juri finally found herself against Shiori. If asked, she probably wouldn't have been able to explain how exactly she knew. The girl's face was fully concealed behind her protective mask. But she _knew_, and when she signaled the with a sharp word for the bout to begin, she felt that petite girl lunge at her without hesitation.

It surprised her. She had to admit that. Seeing the soft girl she once knew so well, come at her so fiercely threw her off mentally. Juri dodged neatly, and let her opponent throw out her best strikes. Their shoes squeaked loudly, mingling with Miki and his partner a short distance away. But in the silent world she went to when she concentrated, Juri heard none of it. She didn't hear her thundering heart, the cries from the students and their cheers. It was all white noise.

Forgettable, meaningless.

A lunge, a clumsy slash and suddenly she was _there_. Every movement the other girl planned was clear as day to her, she had become hypersensitive to every slight twitch of their two bodies. As she counterattacked, Juri felt a gleam of sweat roll down her neck and between the curves of her breasts. Her lips were salty behind her facemask, and her body felt too warm behind the cotton padding that fit her like a second skin. This was her time, her moment. When she held a sword in her hand, nothing mattered anymore. Not even whom she was fighting. Ah…but then this wasn't truly a fight, was it? This was a test for a beginner…and with that in mind she pulled back her enjoyment and her excitement, shoving it into a tight little box inside herself. Concentrate…be cool…a teacher… With a clearer mind, she began to assess Takatsuki as they danced back and forth.

The other girl wasn't bad, her stance and the way she came across with her angles and sword thrusts showed Shiori had undergone some sort of formal training. For a brief time of course. But there were certainly faults to be found… And with that decided, the fencing captain immediately pulled the plug and ended the game.

Juri twisted and gave a vicious lunge to run up parallel along the edge of a sloppy one made by the younger girl, catching her square in the heart. The two froze, Juri still bent in that forward position, Shiori pinned like a butterfly under glass. And then it was over. Shiori stood. Gave the salute and bow of thanks, and took her place along the wall. Juri signaled for the next person in line. And neither girl removed their masks until practice had ended.

It was an hour later, the tryouts were over, and the students had all either gone home or had filtered off to the cafeteria to eat their dinner. Juri was back behind her desk, with Miki perched in a chair next to her. "Yes, he did very well I thought for someone who is just starting…his footwork was a little shaky, but surely we can fix that. Right, Juri-senpai?"

Juri gave an absent nod, and a half-hearted smile as she made another notation to the clipboard. As she marked off another name, Miki hesitantly spoke. The uncertainty in his voice immediately catching her attention. "Ah…Juri-senpai…" She looked up with a patient gaze. "Yes, Miki? Is something the matter?" He looked at her with a cocked gaze, blue eyes searching her face for something. "Are you…feeling better?"

Juri sighed as she looked down at the mess of papers. His question was layered with a deeper meaning, and part of her just wanted to walk out of the room. Why did she need to explain herself? Why did she need _anyone_? But this was _Miki_… and he was one of the few people in this school whom she actually could depend on and trust to a degree. She found she…didn't want to alienate one of her few…friends. Pinching the bridge of her nose she answered carefully.

"I'm feeling somewhat better, health wise. But, recent events still have me…uptight."

The blue haired council member cracked a gentle smile at that, before returning quietly, "You? Uptight? Surely not…"

She looked up at him suspiciously, and was rewarded with a twinkle of amusement in his eyes. Snorting unladylike, she stacked the papers neatly. Unable to deny that she had the necessary talent to gain entry, Juri had had to allow Takatsuki, Shiori's file to be signed off for admittance. It was going to be a long year, she mused. But all there was left to do was grin and bear it. Her professionalism when dealing with her fencing club members wouldn't be…_compromised_.

Miki checked his stopwatch.

"We should be leaving then, if we want to eat dinner in a timely manner." Smiling as he got down from the chair, he waited for the orange curled woman at the doorway, and the two strode out.

"Are we having another go at the library's archives tonight? Perhaps our research will be able to turn something up this time." Juri's brow furrowed slightly, "Of course. I intend to make good use of our free time, since we can no longer depend on Kiryuu or his sister." Her reply was smooth as glass, concealing the fierce fire burning in her heart. They would turn over every rock and dusty crevice in this maze of a school if that's what it took. Duels be damned. Things had gotten far too personal for her liking, and she _would_ get to the bottom of it. Her patience could be endless…

Looking up she paused, seeing someone waiting for them. Shiori was sitting on a bench alone, seemingly waiting for them. Had she been waiting to get Juri alone? Miki saw her hesitate, and swiveled his head to alight on the maroon haired girl. Opening his mouth to question, Juri took a step forward to go to her, but stopped immediately as a young man came jogging over to the bench. She watched a silent exchange, a round of smiles, and the two go off together, arm-in-arm. _Some things never change… _Juri waited till they were gone before leading Miki to the cafeteria once more. The Kaoru twin kept wisely silent.

After an uneventful meal, and hours spent thumbing through boring reports in the library's records room, even Juri had to admit they were getting nowhere. Deciding it best that her younger companion get a decent night's sleep, she bid the tired Secretary goodnight, smiling with genuine affection as he cheerfully promised to wrack his brain for more clues. She waited, seeing him off to the apartments he shared with his twin sister, before trekking across campus herself. A hot pot of tea, the next chapter of the novel she had been reading, and the warmth of her favorite housecoat were all that remained on her mind. It had been a long day. Time to unwind before bed.

"Ah! L-let go of me, I-I told you no!"

Or so she had thought…Eyes narrowing as she hunted for the source of the cries, Juri began lopping on long legs in the direction of the fountains. _Someone past curfew, and it sounded like a girl._ Already she was in full council mode, her face a stern line as she breeze down the walkway, and rounded the tall curtains of water. The slight hiss and the resulting mist obscured her view. But it was definitely two students on the other side. A flash of memory from just hours earlier, and Juri already knew who it was. Sure enough, as she came through the side, there was Shiori, in the grasp of the boy she had seen earlier.

Their little drama caught, Shiori looked up in shock to see Juri striding over with her hackles raised. The boy let go of the other girl's wrist and neck to stammer in surprise.

"O-oh, I was just—" Juri didn't even wait to hear the rest. Without so much as

slowing her gait, she reared back and decked him square in the jaw. With a thud he hit the ground, crying out in pain. Shiori, with both hands over her mouth in fear, slumped to the ground next to him shaking. Wide eyed, she watched him stand as if to hit her back, but then he simply cowered. The ice in the panther's eyes could have frozen hell over.

"I want…to see you _promptly_ tomorrow morning, reporting for detention." Each word was bitten out, with a low growl to them. He gave a solemn nod, and left without a word. She recognized him from one of her math classes. He would be there.

Turning to Shiori, she held out a hand. "Are you alright?"

"Y-yes but I—"

"Good. I expect you to report tomorrow morning as well. This school has a strict curfew, and I expect the rules to be follow by those that attend it." Her authoritative tone was harsh and unforgiving as she narrowed her gaze down the girl who looked up at her in surprise. Shiori refused her hand and got up on her own, her eyes tearing up slightly.

"Juri, I just wanted—"

"I would highly suggest you return to your dorm room."

"But I really only—"

"I'm not in the mood to hear excuses. The rules cannot be bent for anyone. Goodnight Takatsuki-san." She coldly turned and left, not daring to look over her shoulder. Inwardly she felt something inside her break, but she shrugged the feeling off. Things could never be between them. And they couldn't go back to those happier days. It was better this way. It saved her from getting hurt again.

Juri's wintry mood lasted all the way to her dorm room, and even through her nightly shower. She decided to forgo the tea and book and just head on into bed. Suddenly she just didn't feel like it anymore.

To Be Continued.


End file.
